Oliver Stone, Please Stop

Before anyone reads this, you must read the blog below it because you’ll regret it if you don’t. I honestly don’t think I know of a worse director than Oliver Stone, and the sad part about that is he has high acclaim in Hollywood. No, when you make terrible movies like JFK, Nixon, and above all else, Alexander, you seriously need to stop making films. You need to tell yourself, “Wow. I’m really awful. Maybe this just isn’t my cup of tea.” Did Oliver Stone partake in this ethreal reflection? No. And now he has decided to make another president movie about George W. Bush (Everyone should read the blog post by kingdaved below).

I know, I know. Everyone will want to rush out to see “W.” because most everyone hates W. and seeing a Hollywood movie bash the president will be “oh such a jolly good time!” But let me remind you of Alexander, and how long it was, and how it was horribly inaccurate in everyway. How the unlinear story telling wasn’t inventive and exciting, it was boring and annoying. The plot was nonexistent and with that so was the amazing history that should have been included. So, before you think that “W.” will be any good, remember that Oliver Stone is making this film. Oliver Stone.

Personally, I really wish someone would walk up to him and say, “you…..are so horrible….my ears began to bleed, my eyes fell out, and the apocalypse is nigh…all because you make abysmal films. Please, oh, Please Mr. Stone stop your film terrorism. Just stop. Go rethink your life and career because you just aren’t cut out for film-making. You can’t tell a story. You’re like a grandpa who just keeps going, and going with no plot, no good characters. No. No. Mr. Stone, the end has come for your little film fun-time.”

Posted by Alcamadus

The “Unbiased” W. Film

I don’t know about you guys, but I am so freaking excited for the new George W. Bush biopic.  I mean, seriously, of course Oliver Stone will do a good job giving an unbiased look at President Bush.  This may surprise you, but I have been given an early reading of the script. Here’s a summary of my favorite scene.  You ready?  I’m really excited for it.

Here’s the scene: Bush is eating a baby, and torturing teenage pregnant girls while burning the American flag with weed, which in so doing fills the room with marijuana smoke. Then, he and Cheney get together and decide to figure out how they can murder the most people in the most ways possible, so they call up their intelligence folks and tell them to doctor up a fake report, which Cheney rewrites after they tell the “truth” and then they cackle and smoke a cigar with Bin Laden.

Wait…. I dunno if that really happened though.  Oh gee willikers… now I’m concerned.  Oh well, it’s Hollywood; so, how can we not trust it?

Oh no!! I just remembered, Oliver Stone made Alexander….

Posted by kingdaved